Pride Of
a portrait of the artist as his favorite football club
7 years old.
I was at my cousin Hector’s apartment. He lived near the Elmhurst Av. 7 stop. He was my first reference of cool. Fly. Fresh. With the flip phone, the baggy jeans, the blue Yankee fitted and Concord 11s. Wore his white tees for a couple weeks and then bought new ones from the bodega. Liked them crisp. Long (fake) chain.
He was heating up pizza rolls for us as we waited for my sister and mom to get back from shopping. His room smelled like Polo Blue and weed. He would pull out a thick wad of bills, swiftly disrobe them of their rubber band and hand me a couple singles so I could go buy us Arizonas.
He had just gotten FIFA 2004. The one with Henry, Del Piero and Ronaldinho on the cover—running heads down, kits billowing.
I wasn’t allowed to have video games until I was in middle school. So any second I got to play them was coveted. Hector had his phone pressed to his ear while holding his controller. Hushed voice. Playful, teasing.
I was just focused on which team I was gonna pick.
He mouthed to me, “Premier”. Indicating which league I should pick a team from. He was an Arsenal fan. Locked and loaded.
Blue was my favorite color. It took only four flicks until I found that blue.
1. BIG SPENDER(S)
Chelsea spends money like it ain’t a thing. Whether it’s a Russian oligarch funding or a peak 2020s financial amalgamation of private equity investors—the bankroll has no limit baby. Transfer records broken over and over and over. 1 billion+ spent on player transfers in the last 4 years. #1 in the world.
2. RULE BREAKER(S)
When the money comes out of the firehose, you better believe that makes people mad. So the pocket watchers get to work scheming. So finesse. Creative accounting. Hit squad of lawyers. Loopholes to stretch money across time. Loan armies. Paying fat fines because that’s the price of doing big business. Dad always said think bigger.
3. IMPULSIVE
Chelsea invented the mid season manager carousel. Take them out back. The Russian owner was ruthless. He demanded excellence. There was little patience. It didn’t matter if you had a great fondness with the fans, if you had even won a title the year before. If you don’t sustain the greatness, you’re gone. A legacy of lightning.
4. FLAIR
Raw players, full of themselves. The youngest team in the league. Passionate, reckless, hard working villains. Win at all costs.
5. ENTERTAINER(S)
Fighting refs. Last second heroics. Tragic collapses. Double digit shootouts. Chelsea is blockbuster entertainment. The 2010s golden boy was a testament to that. Hazard cared little for anything but getting on the pitch and flowing. Magic in motion. Chelsea puts on a show. Theater on the pitch.
6. ORIGINAL(S)
A club legend who was so iconic—a position was named after him. The French maestro Claude Makelele, who redefined what it meant to be a defensive midfielder. And if you hear him talk about it...he claims it was so obvious to him, so simple to him. That this was how the game was meant to be played. His lineage has followed suit. Essien. Kante. Caicedo. All humility, all power, all engine.
7. HEART
Chelsea never gives up. The bigger the pressure the more favor.
8. WINNER(S)
The most winningest club in soccer history. The only team to win every domestic, continental and international tournament available to them. Captains that are lions of the sport. World Cup champions. The only capital club with a European cup.
9. MYTHICAL
Chelsea. The Trickster King. Obsessed with remembering and being remembered.
